Confessions From A Sick Girl

Being sick comes with a lot of baggage, and when I say a lot, oh boy. Because all I've ever known is being sick, I understand when my significant other want to go do their own thing, hang out with their friends, whatever it is, because I understand that going through what I'm going through is hell, and I don't expect anyone there 100%. But there are a few things that would help get us through it.

Patience. It takes a lot out of  someone 's sick to function like a normal person sometimes. Have patience, daily functions might be too difficult and because it is something your significant other feels they SHOULD be able to do yet are struggling with, it might be getting to them mentally. Remember, you aren't the only person let down.

Adaptability. Again, it's hard to function normally sometimes. Your significant other might make plans they absolutely cannot follow through with when the time comes, and there needs to be a level of respect there. Although this is a big let down, you aren't the only one going through this. Be willing to reschedule, cancel completely, make a different plan for the night, whatever. Trust me, if your significant other is willing to cancel on plans that have been made for a while, they are probably near their breaking point. Don't guilt trip them to that point.

Love. This should be a little self explanatory, but hey. Being sick gets to you mentally, and I can almost guarantee anybody with a chronic illness does not share the love they should for themselves. What I suggest is filling in that gap when they are not able to. The struggle we face being sick is that we let down those around us on bad days, and that's what gets to us. BE THERE, Adapting and having patience will definitely help, but don't be afraid to have a quiet night in where we're both reading separately, or be there as your significant other goes to sleep early. Just be there.

Let us be normal. Although we want you to ask if we're okay, don't assume we can't do the little things like cooking dinner, vacuuming, whatever. We try so hard to be normal that it's really just in your best interest to act as if we are, unless we bring something up ourselves.

-S

You're My Favorite Color

You're my favorite color at 3 am.
The whites of your eyes and nails glow radiantly, like I know your entire soul does- goodness aches from your bones. Keep that glow baby, keep glowing.
Then there's the hint of red blushing on your cheeks at the slight occurrence of an embarrassment, or a fiery topic. Burn like that fire baby, but don't let that fire burn you.
How about the yellow pigmentation off your skin as if the sun is giving you some of its light- shine bright baby, everybody needs your light.
Then there's these blues radiating off your irises like a calm river, but instantly turning into a grey storm, ready to rumble with some heat. Patience baby, a rumbling storm is rarely a good one.
And then I see the black of your shadow and that reminds me of the depth of the world-the hurt and pain. You're not alone, baby, you're never alone.
You're my favorite color at 3 am- pieced together of colors your body absorbs, surrounding me with the complexity of this beautiful world in just a glance.

Opiates May Make Pain Last Longer

So I read an article that brought tons of interest on my part. Opiates have been a well involved part of my life due to my poor health. Fortunately for me, I have found a way to rid the opiates from my life.
Being on opiates is having control in an uncontrollable situation, or so you think at the time. Opiates become a part of control to your life, rather than helping you get a grip on things. It's needing just one more prescription until you can mentally fight the pain, one more pill. So easily obtainable, yet no real results come out of it. I can honestly say that it just masked my pain for years, and it wasn't until I learned how to accept the pain I was in, that I was able to fight the pain without the pills.
This article is definitely a good read, though precise, and mentions that "opiate-based drugs can cause a heightened sensitivity to pain" in some people. I've said this many times before, when I was consumed in the medicine I felt my inability to handle small amounts of pain was remarkable- anything from hitting my arm on the wall or stubbing my toe. "Opioid Induced Hyperalgesia" is the name of this condition- the increased pain sensitivity after chronic opioid use. Not much research has been produced to completely prove that OIH is prevalent and consistently prevalent enough to begin a route of prevention, but I definitely think this should be continued to be researched! In time, I feel as if the hype of pain killers has decreased due to the effects of the medicine, and being a person that has been stuck in the opioid cycle, I definitely think there are other means to handle pain!
Stop the opioid abuse.

https://www.sciencenews.org/article/morphine-may-make-pain-last-longer

-S

Spotify

Spotify gives me the feels EVERY time. I find such good music on there nearly everyday.
Acoustic Covers, and Your Favorite Coffeehouse.
Top stations currently.

Hit me up with your music suggestions!

xoxo
S.